Let Them Know You Will Fight For Them

This week was OAA testing at Paige’s school. They would be tested on their Math and reading skills. (You can read more about that here if you are not aware of the test.) Paige normally does a great job on standardized tests, yet she had major anxiety over this test. We just received her scores back from the STAR testing that she took last year and she scored way above average. This kid is super smart, so why would she be all stressed about a test?

The school administration and teachers, that’s why.

Someone is going around the school (not sure if it is teachers or the administration) and telling the kids how they will get held back if they fail these OAA tests. First of all, scare tactics do not work. If anything it will have the reverse effect and kids will be so stressed out that they won’t be able to focus.

So here is my child, crying and stressing out over a stupid test. I also found out that she wasn’t alone (from Facebook). Children from other districts were having the fear of being held back placed in their heads. Not the best thing to hear when you are a parent.

I calmed Paige’s fears before school explaining how she is a very smart kid and if she does her best she will be just fine and sent her off to school. I was expecting a call from school that she was hysterical, but luckily whatever I said to her worked. She made it through the day.

After I got home from work I ran to her room, where she was playing Barbies, to ask how her day went. Waterworks started immediately. She just let everything out from the whole day and was still stressed about the tests. I took her downstairs to have a talk with Dave and I. Surely he could figure out how to calm her down since I had failed. Dave has been known around these parts as the kid/baby whisperer.

After listening to Paige’s fears, Dave explained to her that no matter what we would fight for her. This ridiculous test was not going to make or break her. If they tried to hold her back in 3rd grade, we would go to battle for her. That was the game changer.

This was all that she needed. All that she wanted to hear was that we would fight for her. And fight for her we will. In my heart though I know that she will be just fine and won’t have any issues with that test, but I know that in the future she may need us to fight for her and I am glad that she knows that we will.

This started out as a different post altogether but over the course of 24 hours it morphed into something totally different. I had this crazy “Mama Bear” post written about how the education system is a joke and how it is ruining our children instead of helping them, but after the above course of events I realized that the most important thing is that your children know that you are there for them no matter what. You will fight for them.

 

Comments

  1. Man can I relate to this more than you know! I think all states have “issues” with their silly state standards. But the more important note here is what you said and that is letting our children know we will always be there for them, regardless. Good, bad, ugly… my husband and I have always communicated to our children that we will be at their side, even if it is their fault because we love them regardless. Our son missed up this summer over a silly thing, and we made him fix it, but we stood by him and helped him fix it. Kids need to know they can count on their parents because if their parents fail them, who can they trust…? This starts a line of mis-trust because as their parents, we are their main source of guidance.

  2. Ugh, I’m so sorry to hear that poor little Paige was freaking out so much about this test :( Poor thing. But what awesome and incredible and inspiring parents you are. All kids should be so lucky :) XOXO

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